Fragments of the Broken
Image hosted by Photobucket.com



Sunday, November 20, 2005
Harry Potter and the Self-Confessed Addict

I am, once again, addicted to Harry Potter.

Haha. It's so good to be back at it again! I mean, it's been two years since I flipped a page of Goblet of Fire. Well, it's due to the fact that a CERTAIN PERSON didn't return it to me for quite some time. I mean, 1 year time. Ehehe.. well..

Just saw the movie last friday. I must admit that it is my favorite among the four movies. It is the best among the four since it's got the effects and the *yum* actors. Haha.. it seems like almost all the cast are good-looking. Hah!

Gosh, I'm sooo in like with Cedric and Viktor. Nyak! Ehehe.. I'm not the type that would fall for "pretty boys" but they were just so, so, so... haiii... *faint*. I so like them! Ehe.. Senxa na. Babae lang.

For always, Harry is cute. Ehe. Even with the funky do, he still looks very much like the Daniel I loved, ooops, I mean LIKE. On the other hand, in my opinion, Ron's getting worse! Ehe.. the whole doesn't d anything. He looks very untidy. Anyway, I still like how he played the part! Hermione is so beautiful. Emma Watson is beautiful. ANd to think, we're the same age! Hay.. ASA! Cho Chang's ok, I guess. NOT! I don't like her. Ewan. Buti na lang onti lng lines nya! *EVIL LAUGH*

Hahaha.. Kinikilig ako kina Viktor Krum at Hermione. Umiyak talaga ako nung na-dedz si Cedric. Huhuhuhu.. Pogi pa naman! Huhuhuh.. The acting in the movie's really good. Especially in the part where everyone's cheering and all tapos umiiyak si Harry kasi nga DEDZ na si Cedric. Grabe. Nakakaiyak yung tatay niya! Go Daddy Diggory!

All in all, gustung-gusto ko talaga yung pelikula kahit sobrang naadik si Direk Mike Newell sa pagtatanggal ng mga scenes sa book. Hai... if only... HAY NAKU! DI hamak naman na mas maganda ito kesa dun sa Harry Potter 3! Injustice ang ginawa! Ang ganda kaya ng book 3 tapos baboy yung pelikula! Amp naman! -___-. Basura ang Three kung ikukumpara sa Four! Wehehe... wala lang. Oh by the way, fave kong book ang 3 at 4. So, hindi ako naging bias sa dalawang pelikula. It's just that, 3 sucks. And 4 is way better than it.

Hehe.. Nakakaadik!

april28 wept at 04:51 pm
s (3) cared.  




Monday, November 14, 2005
Cure

I've finally found something to make the pain go away.

You should congratulate me.  Honestly, I don't want to be bitter. But, I know, it can't be helped. Nakakaasar kasi ang lakas nyang manakit. Todo siya. Masyadong malaki ang effect niya sa akin. Nakakaasar. Habang tumatagal kasi, nagiging importanteng parte na siya ng buhay ko. Para bang bawat araw na lumilipas, mas tumataas yung value niya. Para na naman akong ewan.

Lahat yun ay natigil nung Friday last week. Ang sakit noh! wala lang. Masyado na akong nahihirapan sa sarili kong situation kaya naman kailangan nang itigil pa ang kung anumang nasimulan. Masakit isipin pero it's time to break away from the infatuation... or love just mistaken.

This will be the last time. Friday is the last time I'd ever be concerned and hurt.

Na-realize ko. ANg sakit naman. Mabuti naman ang intentions ko towards the person pero wala na namang nangyari. Bakit kung sino pa yung may mabuting intention ay yun pa yung laging nasasaktan?Nakaka-bad trip ang buhay.

So sad naman. Pero, ayus lang naman ako. Don't worry about me. I'm fine. I've found the cure and that is a SMILE.

"Being happy does not mean that everything is perfect. It means that you've decided to see life beyond imperfections. So don't say you are happy because everything is alright. You are happy because everything sucks but you're fine. "

april28 wept at 05:05 pm
Who cares?  




Thursday, November 10, 2005
Beauty and Bitterness

Help me remember to forget. Memories are sweet but are they enough?

First of all, I am not bitter! Well, I'm sort-of bitter but not THAT bitter! un lang!

Second, wala naman. I'll just rant. Haha.. I was browsing Arlaj's page when I read her latest post about real beauty. This topic got me thinking. What is real beauty? I'm not sure. All I know is, when you're happy and comfortable with yourself and the people around you, then, you're beautiful. But, in the REAL world, the physical, obviously, comes first. Such people are idiots. But, hey, let's face it. At least, they're being honest.

This is the thing that bugs me about the topic. WHy do people have to be damn "nice" with their definitions of beauty? I mean, hello, we all know what's happening in the real world. We are living in it, after all. And also, why do they have to be all-"Beauty inside is what matters most yadda yadda.." The act is getting old, people! Why hide in masks? Why can't they be true to themselves?

It all started in Filipino class, it was the discussion of real beauty. We were reading all our poems, slogans, essays in front with the topic of Real Beauty. Grabe. Para lang akong nakinig sa isang sirang plaka. I heard the same things every time a new speaker goes to the front. wow. Because of that, I decided to write a poem against what they are saying. Haha.. I'm being cynical that time. When I was suddenly asked by my teacher about my stand in the discussion, I was completely caught off-guard. Haha, she noticed. Well, I said something that made her react. Ewan ko sa kanya. It irritated me so much. Ang phony kasi ng mga tao.

Third, I talked to the ever-so-smiling Gigay yesternight. Haha, she's such a nice person to talk to. I'm so comforted when I talk to her about THAT person. She asks me questions that caught me off-guard and right off the bat. She is frank and direct to point kaya minsan, nakakatakot. Ehe. All the things she said got me thinking. Is it just infatuation, then why am I hurting this much?

Ayun. Di ako bitter. Nasasaktan lang cguro ako. Hurting's more the term.

"you're two tables away. you could see me mesmerized. i want to talk to you but i'm so scared. before i never cared, infatuation's never there. but now, it's killing me. i really hate myself." -typecast


april28 wept at 07:48 am
Who cares?  




Tuesday, November 08, 2005
He will never know..

There's something in my mind. It's bugging me to death. I can't seem to understand what happened.

This made me realize something I can't deny. The fact that you're still with her hurts like a thousand knives stabbing me, REPEATEDLY. It's hard to completely fend off loneliness since that thought keeps me puzzled. It reminds me of something very BITTER. I seem to have lost something of value and worth. The pain is just so immense but still, everytime I close my damn eyes, guess who I see. You.

Unbelievable sorrow just numbs me. I can't help but feel sorry for.. for myself. Maybe, I'll just try and go on with this act, this facade. I'll put on the mask of never-ending optimism and "happiness". Anyways, he will never know.

"What you think and what I feel doesn't make any sense..."

april28 wept at 08:59 am
Who cares?  




Saturday, November 05, 2005
Loyalty's a Bitch

In high school, I was like one of the biggest "loyalistas" ever. A loyalista is like a supporter of some sort. Ehe.. in my case, loyalist ako ng mga love team, ng mga naging section ko at syempre sa mga HEARTs ko.

Ayieee!

But, then, damn. Loyalty used to be my friend but now, it's my enemy. Loyalty's one big word I don't want to mess with since you can't totally beat the LOYALTY out of someone. Ahh.. I hate him. He's become loyal to THIS person. It sucks when you fall for a loyalist. Kase, buti kung loyal siya sa iyo.. eh, hinde eh, sa ibang tao pa..

Why do things work out that way for me? I mean, I'm loyal to a lot of things pero when it comes down to me, no one's ever loyal. Grrr.. Well, I do have friends. But, arggghh, that's different! Nakakaasar! This loyalty issue pisses me off! I really hate THAT idiot. Grrrr...

But, then.. how I like him!

Maybe, I'm.. loyal to him. Aye.. Haha.. Wow. Fine. Fine. Well, after all, I depend on him. *wushu*

Haha.. enough of Charlie. I have this big, big "kras". Haha. And he's Steeeveeee.. juk! Ako lang tumatawag nyan sa kanya. Ampanget nga eh. Siguro, titirahin ako ng mga fans. Ahehe.. Back to Steveee, I heart him with all my addicted-fangirl-glory! Yipeee! Steveee!

Whoa. Enough of love and loyalty.. One thing's for sure, I'd be forever attached to both of them! .^_^.

"Please do stop and think about it.. You're better off with a loser like me.." -Typecast

april28 wept at 05:06 pm
(1) cared.  




Thursday, November 03, 2005
Foolish Dependence

Damn. It's really hard when you fall for a person who doesn't LOVE you.

It's quite difficult to deal with the fact that your world revolves around the same person. It's even ahrder to fall for that person SECRETLY. You won't let go of any opportunity to catch a glimpse of him. And for every CHANCE you get, you'll for sure grab it and make it "worth it". And whenever THAT person is around, you just stare away and pretend to be as natural as you can be. Damn. It's hard loving someone from afar. It's damn hard loving YOU this way.

I'm depending on you. I am depending on you. I am depending on you.

Actually, it's very foolish to depend on something or someone that's not certain. I mean, if you would depend on someone, you'll make sure that THAT person would be someone who's sensible and who's standing on solid ground. Am I right? Agree with me!

THAT person I'm depending on is the exact opposite of a dependable person. Hah! He needs more comfort and caring than any other person in this world. He's very vulnerable and indeed, very innocent. Damn. innocent? He doesn't look like that but I know he is, deep inside. He's just hiding the truth while confining himself in this SHELL. I would very much LOVE to break into that!

Hmm.. What am I going through right now? Heartbreak is an understatement.

I want to cast these feelings away. I want to feel NUMB.

Because it HURTS.

Damn it.

"I do not want you to be sad.. I only want you to be happy.. Even if it's not with me."

april28 wept at 12:38 am
Who cares?  




Sunday, October 30, 2005
Ranting Away...

"You will never know..."

Un
I am so weird. Ako na yata ang pinaka-in-denial na tao sa buong mundo. If there are POSERS who are pretending to be what they are not, there are people like me who doesn't want to be what they really are. Ahehe.. That is my predicament right now. Well, you might say.. Magpakatotoo ka. It's damn easy to say that but it is damn hard to actually do that! Minsan kasi, may mga bagay sa sarili natin na ayaw natin. Uhmm, Hating oneself? That type. Like me, I am totally inconsistent and contradicting. I don't have any identity problems since I know myself. I'm just like that contradicting. Mahirap man isipin, kilala ko na ang sarili ko. Magulo at mahirap lang ang magpakatotoo sa mga bagay-bagay lalo na yung mga ayaw mo.

Tanggapin. OK fine. That's the only resolution, I guess. Magwawala na talaga ako. Grrr...

Deux
There are a lot of things in this world na tunay namang nakakabaliw. Hindi mo na maintindihan sa sobrang gulo. It's like na-sandwich ka na sa iba't ibang magkakaibang bagay kaya tuloy ngayon, hindi mo na maintindihan kung saan ka pupunta. Sabi ko, madaming bagay sa mundong ito na nakakabaliw. Haha.. And I am one of them.

Oh, and YOU are too. ^__^

Trois
Hay... Life can be so unfair. I only wanted the person to be happy. WHY can't he be happy with me? Damn. That's just too sad isn't it? Or is it selfish?! hahahaha.. Can someone please help me out on this one? AM I SELFISH if... I want a certain person to be happy because of me? I mean, is it selfish to make someone happy and take credit for it? Is it selfish to make that person forget everything about HIS past just by being there for him? Am i freaking selfish for wanting that person to be happy?

Quatre
Nakakaasar talaga ang mga taong nagpapakagago sa iisang tao. At, ako yun. Damn, AT, siya na rin pala. Tanga tayo parehas. As in. Pero, alam mo, ang masakit, nagpapakatanga ka sa kanya habang ako sa iyo. ANg galing noh!? It's like a chain. CHain of fools. Ehe.. But, you know, I am the biggest loser here since no one cares. for me. Well... life.. is a bitch. Haha..

Cinq
Wala lang. Nag-tagalog na ako ngayon. Para feel na feel ko talaga ang pag-RARANT ko.. aheheh.. LSS aku.. kaya ito! Namnamin mo!

"I love you
YOU NEVER FEEL THE SAME
Though we're apart
You're in my heart
Give me one more CHANCE to
Make It Real"

"WE're slightly weathered, WE're slightly worn
Our hands grip together, eye to eye through the storm
I still believe in EVER AFTER with YOU.
Cause LIfe is a pleausre with YOU by my side
And there aint no current in this river WE can't ride
I still believe in EVER AFTER with YOU."

tae. asa pa.

Pamatay.. PANDAY!
"Pagkat sa isang taong mahal mo nang buong puso
Lahay ay gagawin..
Makita kang muli.."

hay... BITTER-BITTERAN na naman ako.

april28 wept at 09:21 am
Who cares?  




Previous Page Next Page


Image hosted by Photobucket.com
r e f l e c t i o n
..a memory and an introduction..

April Czareen Cruz
.15 years old.
.unbelievable.
.intellectual, musical and artistic.
.quite weird.
.unlike YOU.

l o v e s
..there is nothing between us..

.Music.
.Anime.
.Web Design.
.Fashion Design.
.Shoes.
.Stars.
.the Moon.
.Final Fantasy.
.Orange, Blue, Pink, Black.
.Orange Juice.
.Tangerine.
.MaSci.
.Lavo.
.Kepler.
.DARWIN.
.Roe-ROENTGEN!.
.tgenZ.
.Ad Chem(o?).
.English.
.my friends.
.PS2.
.internet surfing.
.weird stuff.
.rawrrr!!!.
.fast cars.
."Strekoza".

m u s i c
..it binds our ears and hearts..

.Typecast.
.Sandwich.
.Eraserheads.
.Cambio.
.Sugarfree.
.Stonefree.
.Parokya ni Edgar.
.Imago.
.Paramita.
.Kitchie Nadal.
.Daydream Cycle.
.Spongecola.
.Orange and Lemons.
.Incubus.
.CC.
.Dashboard Confessional(thanks to Emo Kid-you know who you are-).
.The All-American Rejects.
.Novice.
.Saosin(rawrrr!!!).
.Brand New.
i love! (Image hosted by Photobucket.com)
i HEART you!

t h o u g h t s
..these are all we need..
«|| |Maya-maya lang may ilaw na.. Pero sana malaman mo.. Magkailaw man.. Madilim pa rin.. Kung wala ka..|
||»

«|| |... Weee! ...| ||»

«|| .Words are not important. .Smiles are all I need from you. ||»

«|| nYeH! ||»


speak up, little kid



   





<< November 2009 >>
Sun Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat
01 02 03 04 05 06 07
08 09 10 11 12 13 14
15 16 17 18 19 20 21
22 23 24 25 26 27 28
29 30

Me
l o y a l t y
..someday you'll be back and until that time, i'll wait for you..
All Time Favorite Anime: Cowboy Bebop Ruruoni Kenshin: Tsuikohen OAV Naruto Series Haku of Naruto Hatake Kakashi of Naruto Rock Lee of Naruto Takuto Kira of Full Moon wo Sagashite Uchiha Sasuke of Naruto Uzumaki Naruto of Naruto Yuuhi Aogiri of Ayashi no Ceres InuYasha, Kikyou and Kagome Love Triangle of InuYasha Athrun and Cagalli of Gundam SEED Ayato Kamina and Haruka Shirow of RahXephon Tachikawa Mimi and Ishida Yamato of Digimon Tidus and Yuna of FFX and FFX-2

r e s p e c t
..forever then will i wait..
.Abram.
.Ahjh.
.Angelin.
.April.
.Arlaj.
.Ate Chai.
.Biankee.
.Cez.
.Chynes.
.Cue-Ball.
.Danish.
.Grace.
.Iya.
.Jomar.
.Kumiko.
.Lanie.
.Megane-kun.
.Mhackie.
.Yasu.

t h a n k s
..you were in front of me all the time..
.God for the "talent"(there is, i believe). .Adobe Photoshop 7.0 for the whatever's. .i-republic for the internet connection(wehehe). .PhotoBucket for the pics. .Roentgen for the addiction. ."Strekoza" for the inspiration.






Contact Me

If you want to be updated on this weblog Enter your email here:




rss feed

bitter!!!(Image hosted by Photobucket.com)
I swear.(Image hosted by Photobucket.com)
.hehe.(Image hosted by Photobucket.com)

Leave me here
Or stay forever
Smile for me
Please do remember
The sun shall rise
And change the weather
It’s time to say goodbye to forever.
Blogdrive






Blogdrive